yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
The Olympian is in my bed
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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