is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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