So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize