Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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