Will you blow on my dice?
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Randomize
