we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize