And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
