Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
