he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
