Can i not drive my cunt home
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
a search helicopter?!
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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