Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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