my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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