break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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