there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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