is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
