Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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