i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
it's great music for shaving your balls
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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