pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
