if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
