I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
