why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Congratulations! We have a period
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