your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
