butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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