If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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