Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
