I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Can I color on your dick again?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize
