I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
