That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
