Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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