Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
