what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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