i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
