Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
