Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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