Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
