dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
