is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It's just like the Real World with babies
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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