wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
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