Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize