He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
