im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
