the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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