So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
