did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
