Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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