My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm just crazy horny about you
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
