He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize