Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
