Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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