omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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