Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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